I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
