All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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