Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
