My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
