Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
So squirting runs in the family.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
