living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
