I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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