We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
