I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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