I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
This is the high leading the old right now
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Randomize
