Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize