i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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