he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
