Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
