we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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