We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Pants are for mortals
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
