saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize