Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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