Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize
