If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
