i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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