I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
