just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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