You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize