Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I just got carded by a ten year old.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
