He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
