We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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