happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
