How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.