I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
