apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
this will be a night to untag.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Sorry my hands just texted you
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Boobs are out for the taking
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize
