remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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