We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize