Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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