This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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