I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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