ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
