My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
