Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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