It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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