did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
