i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
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Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
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Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
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