I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
