i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize