Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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