sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
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okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am