so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
