Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My butt remains clenched, sir.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize