do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.