there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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